Junior prom and a good friend

October 14, 2012

This post is about Junior prom, and subsequently, senior prom. In 11th grade I had a classmate in my English class, I’ll call her Stacey. She had also been in my chemistry class the year before, so I had known her for a full year by the time we were juniors. She was a true friend to me, and she genuinely wanted me to have a good time when she insisted that I go with her to Junior Prom. I gave her many indications that I was less than inclined to go, but she politely and artfully ignored them. My defences were very lame and she didn’t relent, so I finally gave up and thought to myself what the heck, I’ll go. Perhaps something in my nonverbal behavior suggested that I really did want to go deep inside, which was the truth. I trusted her, as she and I had had numerous phone conversations, and she would confide to me things that were upsetting her, be they family issues, boy issues, or other things that might have been bothering her or that she just wanted to talk about. I didn’t always understand what she was talking about, but I guessed from what she was saying that she truly considered me a good friend. She asked me to go to prom in the first place because she wanted me to come out of myself. By that I mean to say she wanted me to have fun. I’ll be perfectly honest; in high school I didn’t have many friends and going out with people other than family on the weekends was extremely rare for me. At first I felt somewhat puzzled by her request, and a bit indignant that she had singled me out to extract from a shell. “Shell” in this case really means “protection,” not that I was really encased in something or that she or I considered me to be a shell of a person. She clearly couldn’t have thought that, or else we would never have had the kinds of deep conversations over the phone that I mentioned previously.

The prom WAS a great success. I cannot now recall exactly how I felt at the time because it was over a decade ago. But it certainly was memorable. She and I occasionally catch up via Facebook. I will always be grateful to her for reaching out to me and twisting my arm so to speak, and push me to go out and have fun. We went to senior prom together also, as friends. Until then, I never thought I would be remotely interested in attending the senior prom, as that year was one of the most challenging of my life in many ways. But after having such a great experience the year before, I simply couldn’t refuse.

Collaborative, Andrea and Athena
Ps. This occurred a few years before we actually admitted to ourselves and others that we were plural. We haven’t told Stacey, and are not sure when or if we will. It will happen if it is meant to happen. I think it would be kind of a strange thing to tell her now since we aren’t in touch all that often.


One comment

  1. Supportive NTs: not easy to come by, but I”m glad that one worked out. One can learn a lot about a person by the company xe keeps, though.

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